As most of you know, I’m a mom to two boys of my own and one bonus son. We are a boy household through and through. There is baseball, football, nerf guns, countless nerf bullets, legos, stinky socks, smelly gym clothes, and lots of video games. As a boy mom, I find myself saying things like:
- “Don’t hit your brother! Please just be nice.
- “If you’re going to fart, please leave the dinner table.”
- “Why is this sticky? What is it?”
- “Who forgot deodorant today?”
- “Why does it sound like a herd of elephants is stampeding in the house?!”
- “The bathroom smells like pee….AIM or CLEAN it!”
- “4 hours of Call of Duty is plenty….”
- “I’m sure I’m not the ONLY mom in the pickup line without a bra.”
There are countless other things I can list but I’m sure you get the idea. Boys are a unique creature. When mine were small, they were so easy. Peyton was literally the kid that played with boxes. He really enjoyed the plastic wipes container. As he grew, it was trucks, hot wheels and legos. Bradley has always been equally as easy to please. He liked action figures and hot wheels more than legos but still didn’t require much. Little boys see the world in black and white. Everything is so literal to them, so you always know exactly what they are feeling. My boys have always been great at showing emotions. It often looks like their hands around their brothers neck…..but I never questioned how they felt! Black and white….clear cut and direct. Obviously that means you’re pissed….I am a pro at this parenting game by the way. Clearly, I’ve got it figured out.
That is….I was a pro until we hit the tween years. My sweet, sweet boy is 12. With 12 comes all kinds of new things that I wasn’t prepared for. For those of you that don’t have boys, or haven’t reached this age….let me just explain. 12 year old boys are awkward. Like seriously weird right now. They aren’t quite young men yet, but they aren’t really a kid anymore. Just like everything else in my life, they are stuck in the middle. It turns out, that’s not an easy place to be. 12 year old boys are like a little ticking time bomb. You know it’s going to explode, you know something will trigger it…..you just aren’t sure what.
They are beginning to explore their independence. This looks like being dropped off at the football game with his friends, or letting him stay up a little later since he’s arrived at junior high. 12 year old boys also begin exploring other things. Mine seems to be exploring the shower a lot. He sometimes takes 3 showers a day, and is usually in there for a minimum of 20 minutes. I’m sure he’s just admiring the carpentry of the bathroom. Maybe he’s studying to be a plumber, the bathroom is a good place to start. He is also the cleanest person in our home, so at least we have that going for us. 🤦🏻♀️
Lately, my beloved 12 year old has been slightly….moody. 🤦🏻♀️ That’s putting it nicely friends, he literally goes from sweet and loving to demonic possession in an instant. Some days he may spend the better part of the day in his room, only emerging for food and bathroom breaks. Sometimes I’m certain he looks like a little vampire, squinting at the lights.
Let me provide an example for those of you that are visual learners. I’m sitting on the couch, Peyton emerges from his bat cave. He ducks his head and walks towards the kitchen, hoping I don’t speak to him. “Hey bub! While you’re up, would you grab your socks from the floor and put them in the dirty?” I say, as nicely as I can to avoid poking the bear. “Seriously, MOM?! Why do I have to do everything around here?” He screeches as he begins to cry.
It took me a few moments to process what was happening. Ok, now we’re crying….super. Why are we crying? What did I say? Was it my tone? Shit….he’s still crying. What do I say? I have a 50/50 shot at saying the wrong thing. My adrenaline is going like it’s the last 3 seconds of the playoffs and I’ve got the ball.
“Ok, obviously you’re a little upset right now but I’m not sure why. I just asked you to pick up your socks. No one else needs to pick them up because they belong to you. You left them in the floor. See where I’m going with this bud?” I tried to end light hearted in hope we would avoid a fight. My plan was foiled by the copious amounts of hormones he has raging through his little body. We went from crying to full on melt down, stomping, sighing loudly, rolling eyes, the works. Listen y’all, 5 years ago I would have stood up, yelled some things about respect, and sent him to his room. He would emerge 10 minutes later a better boy with a whole new attitude. But not today, nope….Jesus took the wheel to save my mouthy little demon child. Instead, I took a very long….deep breath to compose myself. I prayed a quick prayer in my head because I knew only the good Lord could save my baby from what I was prepared to do to him.
“Excuse me sir, I’ve tried to be nice. I’m not speaking to you that way and I suggest you don’t speak to me that way. Pick up the socks, go to your room, and do not come out until you have adjusted your attitude.” I said with a stern tone so he knew I still meant business. He quickly picked up the socks and walked to his room. The positive side, he didn’t slam the door. Poor kid had to go back and walk the stairs at our apartment every time he slammed a door or stomped away. He’s never done it since. 🤣
Y’all, I just want my sweet boy back. The one that wanted to snuggle in the mornings or watch tv with me at night after dinner. I miss the kid that loves to ride around in the car with me while I run errands. Or the little guy that sings in the shower because he just has so much joy in his heart. I know in my heart, he will return. After some tough preteen and teenage years, he will return to his sweet, gentle self. At least I pray that he does.
Until that happens though, I’m gonna need y’all to pray for him. He is going to need it if this attitude keeps up! Pray for me, as we navigate another uncharted territory together. You see, I was 21 when he was born. He and I have grown up together in a lot of ways. We’ve had lots of “firsts” together. This is just another first we must walk through together. It may be the most challenging one yet though. I don’t know about y’all but I’m just trying not to raise assholes. 🤣🤷🏻♀️
The Mommy Chronicles 